How to Stop Arguing and Start Resolving Conflict as a Couple

Arguments are not the problem. Unresolved conflict is. Many couples repeat painful patterns and feel stuck, hopeless, or emotionally unsafe.

Why conflict escalates

Conflict escalates when couples feel emotionally unsafe; criticised, dismissed, abandoned, or controlled.

Three conflict styles

1) Attack/attack

2) Attack/withdraw

3) Withdraw/withdraw

How to resolve conflict (not just end it)

- focus on process not content

- speak from vulnerability not accusation

- set boundaries (no name-calling, repair after conflict)

- develop repair language

What couples therapy does differently

Therapy helps identify the conflict cycle, explore deeper unmet needs, and create practical new ways of relating.